Craft Wars Ep. 4: Altar or Falter

Ok, these photos are gonna be weird. I took them while sitting on the floor in my livingroom, as I do, in real life, cuz I don’t like couches (I know…), so you will be seeing the tv from my real life perspective since I’m too lazy to stand up. Awesome, right? Let’s go!

Meet your craftestants!

Giggles: I met Giggles at RenegadeSF. I couldn’t help but notice how cheery and bubbly smiley she was throughout the whole episode (except during The Candlestick Debacle when I could tell she lost her shit for a second).

Needles: She mentions in her intro that she always has a pair of knitting needles on her, and her dream is to open up a yarn shop. (Hire me, Needles! p.s. sorry your eyes are closed here…my bad.)

DollarDiva: She calls herself Krafty Kathy, but this is my blog, and I give you your nick name! She says that she once decorated a wedding with just stuff from the dollar store.

Pop Craft Challenge: Make a keepsake box for kids out of locks and keys in 1 hr.

(Everybody kept saying, “WE GOT THIS!!!” on this episode. Everybody got theses, beezies.)

Judging begins!

Needles is up first. She made a keepsake box inspired by a sandcastle with a bunch of keys on top looking all spire-y.

Judges: NEEDS MORE COLOR. TOO MUCH LIKE REAL SAND.

Next: DollarDiva. Her keepsake box was inspired by the tooth fairy to put your tooth in. She kept calling it a One Stop Shop for Tooth Loss.  She made her tooth fairy a little tiara out of keys, there was a pillow inside, and there were keys and locks kinda glued on the whole thing.

JUDGES: YOUR WINGS STINK. YOU JUST GLUED SOME THINGS ONTO ANOTHER THING.

Next: Giggles. Her keepsake box was inspired by a little gnomey-cottage, and half of the roof hinged up to get into it.

Judges: YOUR GNOME-HOME IS EMPTY INSIDE.     …   LITERALLY.

In the end, the judges felt that Dollar Diva had not used the keys as well as the other ladies, and she had to pack up her glue gun.

Master Craft Challenge: Blue jeans, borrowed candle sticks, new invitations, old baby blankets. Create something for a wedding in 5 hours using all the materials.

Needles planned to make a photo booth, and Giggles planned to make a wishing tree that would take the place of a guestbook.

Needles started to use the jeans to make decorative garlands by cutting out jean circles and sewing them together.

Giggles used the invitations to also make decorative garlands and was also cutting out paper circles with a paper punch.

Giggles used her jeans to decorate the trunk of her wishing tree, but it was looking too jeany and not so dreamy…hence….solution!

Okay, so here is the aforementioned Candlestick Debacle. Giggles’ team was making this message-holder thing by gluing candlesticks together, and her assistant accidentally knocked it over. Giggles was all, “ARE YOU FREAKING KIDDING ME?!”

Her assistant’s face was like, “NOOOOOOOOO! AHHHHHHHHH!” kinda like in Superman 1 when Superman found Lois dead in a car during the earthquake, and he threw his head back passionately, and screamed the scream of a million screams.

Onto the judging!

Needles was up first. Sorry the photo is crappy. Her photobooth was decorated with blue jean circle garlands and pom pom trim and baby blanket garlands. She had a bench covered in fabric. And then she made her signs by gluing yarn into words.




Her garlands, her signs, and the light fixture she made with the candle sticks got big ups from the judges, but Stephen was like, “Grrrrrrl, dat bench….!”

Her bench kinda looked like a butt. But I guess butts go on it, so it’s logical.

Ok, the photos I have of Giggles’ wishing tree are REALLY BAD. SORRY!!!

The judges ended up liking the candlestick message holder, which, of course, I didn’t get a shot of, and they liked the glitter and the garlands and the originality and whimsicality of the whole concept. However….

…and….

But you know what? As we are starting to learn here on Craft Wars, GLITTER WINS ALL. Everyone’s motto should now be: WE GOT THIS GLITTER.

Classic: Giggles was jumping up and down too much for me to get a good shot of her winning.

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11 Responses to Craft Wars Ep. 4: Altar or Falter

  1. Danielle says:

    All I can say is that tooth fairy box might give me nightmares tonight. SHE’S COMIN’ FER YER TEETH IN THE NIGHT!!!

    That sandcastle box is actually super cute.

    I really like both of the final projects, I guess I am a garland fan.

    • TwinkieChan says:

      I gotta tell ya, I kinda liked the tooth fairy box. Pink + Gold = instant win in my book! Or at least 50 bonus points! 😛

  2. Shell says:

    Loved this !
    I don’t know if we will get it over here or not but there is some kind of sewing comp thing here taking auditions in the same style as the British Bake Off ..

  3. Giggles was my childhood nickname! Funny review and yes I did lose my shit for a moment when I those candlesticks fell 😉

  4. I was so mortified when I thought I had knocked over the candlesticks! But when you look at the clip closely, they sort of just collapsed on their own, thank gawd my fat ass was a few inches away. But I did indeed pray to the glitter gods for a few moments there…serenity now, serenity now! lol

    • TwinkieChan says:

      I don’t know why I totally assumed that a person had to have actually knocked them off. It was the craft gods, throwing you guys a loop!

      I loved your serenity face. It brought much drama to the moment!

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