So sorry for radio silence and lack of real updates. A lot has been changing in my life, and I’ll blog about all of it eventually.
For now, I just wanted to let you know that Bibi passed away on Monday night.
As you might have read before, Bibi has been battling mast cell tumors for more than a year. She has had 3 surgeries, 2 rounds of chemo, and recently, one radiation treatment. Before she had her radiation treatment, we knew we would probably never beat this cancer, but we kept trying, because she seemed to remain in good spirits. However, during her 2nd chemo round, her leg had swelled so much from groin to ankle that her oncologist told us the only way to relieve just the swelling was probably radiation, so we tried. She also started to have difficulty breathing, which was attributed to possible pneumonia. Within a week, she became extremely lethargic, so we held off on any further treatment. 2 weeks later, she was no longer wanting to eat. Her anemia got worse, and she was just so weak. One of her oncologist was trying to figure out why she was anemic and thought maybe there was a bleed somewhere in her GI tract. Bibi spent all day in bed and would only get up to drink water or go to the bathroom. We syringed water into her mouth so she wouldn’t have to get up every time. I ended up hand-feeding her each meal and making home-cooked food and just trying everything I could to get her to eat something, but it quickly became very clear that she was telling us something, and that it was time to let her go. Manda helped me take her to get one more ultrasound, and it showed a lot of problems with different organs, including her heart. It was a really difficult decision, and you never know if you are doing the right thing. We had a home appointment, and it was very peaceful, and she passed surrounded by the people who loved her the most.
As a single, childless dog-lady, losing my pup has left a huge hole in my heart. Even sadder, Bunny behaved very oddly in the first 48 hours after Bibi left. They had never behaved as if they were that bonded, but Bunny already acted weird when the vet came to to our house, and she became listless and would not eat. Luckily, she has started to eat a little already, and I’m sure she will be ok, but of course, it will not be the same for any of us.
There’s other stuff going on, but for now, that’s all I have time for. I haven’t really had a full-night’s sleep for 2 months. For many weeks, Bibi was in an e-collar and on steroids, so she had to pee every 2-3 hours and couldn’t fit through the doggie door! I’m still trying to catch up, and I just feel exhausted every minute of the day. I said no to an art show I had already committed to and feel really bad about it, but I know I have to look out for me, too.
More soon! I promise.